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& things change so you gotta move on..

 Its amazing how much things have changed since my last post. I was scared of going to some school which is crowded. 
Now I'd go just anywhere but here. He left the school. Just like that, he dropped the bomb on me before i could. 
Of course, i cried for ages and then came the depression. So much for being feminist.
At first, this place haunted me because everywhere i had these tiny memories with him even though they aren't much. Then i had the most awful day of my life when this kid won't stop troubling, he even had the gall to pull out my chair while i was sitting and i landed on the floor straight on my ass. 
The next day was not bad, and i ALMOST liked it.
Then came today, when he showed up out of the blue to give a retest. 
I don't know whether i was happy or not. Cos seeing him just ruined all the progress.
We didn't talk the entire day except at the departure when he wanted my earphones and called me that stupid name he has kept for me.
In that moment, I was VERY happy. But I had to leave just then.
It doesn't matter though. I realized today, we belong from two different worlds. I am not implying that people from seperate leagues can't make a good match. However, they have to put in the effort to make the other person a part of their life and be a part of their's too. 
But in our case, it just isn't happening.
He has a totally different life and i am nowhere in it.
All day he hanged out with his brother whom he hates, and played the guitar, which is his entire world apart from the Playstation.
Maybe once upon a time, i was a priority to him and i shall always cherish those moments, he called me everyday even if he didn't have his phone. But now things have changed and all i can do is accept them. Maybe I should have called him more often and made him feel important, but i have also accepted that i am not just that kind of a person. I cannot call somebody and expect them to leave whatever they're doing to talk to me.
So, I have decided now that, we are worlds apart and won't meet ever again (cos we never go on any outing) && we would hardly talk on phone or chat, i should eventually forget him. And it will be a happy memory forever.
I just look forward to my new life in a new school and hope for the best.
Also i wish him all the luck with HIS new life too. May he find the perfect person for himself.
I just hope we remain acquaintances (if not friends) and don't forget each other. I know, I won't.
So, even if i am not the happiest person right now and wish things hadn't turned out this way, i am done with being depressed.
I have learnt my lesson and I will live with it.
:)
 
Much Later,
Love,
S
 

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